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06/01/2007 10:58 AM ID: 62799 Permalink   

Study: Children Often Meeting Online Friends


A study by the Web security firm Garlik has found that 20 per cent of children aged between 8-15 years often meet up with friends they met on the Internet, and one in 20 meet them on a regular basis. Just 7% of parents are aware of this.

The study also showed that some 40% of this age group visit Web sites their parents have forbidden and many give out personal details freely and without their parents' permission. The study has been dubbed a "shocking wake-up call" to UK parents.

30% of children gave out their full name on the 'Net, 46% disclosed their school details, 12% handed over their home address and 9% shared family photos. 90% of parents said they monitored their child whilst they were online.

    WebReporter: NuttyPrat Show Calling Card      
ASSESS this news: BLOCK this news. Reason:
  doesnt look like  
"90% of parents said they monitored their child whilst they were online" are actually monitoring, if they were then 20% wouldn't hook up with people they met online, give out details...
  by: securityunion     06/01/2007 01:13 PM     
Some peoples idea of monitoring is rather vague, ie, yes, I'm aware my child uses the internet.
  by: Gogevandire   06/01/2007 01:18 PM     
  This just in...  
"Teenagers likely to rebel against parents."

First off, I don't know how an 8 year old is getting away with that.

Second, if you think your child is going to acknowledge everything you say, you're wrong.

Third, if you've taught your kids properly, they'll deal with these decisions with a degree of caution, even when they defy you.
  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 02:23 PM     
  Any parent that thinks the internet is safe  
is an idiot and shouldn’t be let near a child. You don’t let your children frequent bars do you? You don’t let your child drive your car do you? Do you really think the internet is any safer than those activities? It’s not! The dangers are real and very anonymous which makes it even more dangerous. I am all for a Ban on children on the internet. Make it a crime for anyone under the age of 16 to use the internet. It has become obvious that parents aren’t going to protect their children from this danger. Maybe if we made it a crime and threw the children and their parents in jail for accessing the internet they would take it seriously and keep their children out of harms way. I’ve seen social services take children away from parents for letting them do things that are much safer than surfing the internet. It’s time parents start parenting. Make them responsible for their children and their children’s actions. Society shouldn’t be suffering because of irresponsible parents. The easiest solution, shut the internet off at your home, if that is not an option, install a password to access the net. Stop abusing the rights of adults and endangering adults, we created the internet, it is ours. Just like driving and bars, the children will get their turn when they become adults.
  by: Valkyrie123     06/01/2007 02:47 PM     
Actually, I'd have to agree. For no other reason than, I hate when 12 year olds ruin my games@!#!@

There is probably nothing worse than a 12 year old running around some random game yelling through his microphone (voice chat was such a wonderful invention) "OMG UR A H4X0R LAME H4X)4an askjd asijasdhjka". Then he goes into a teamkilling rampage, effectively ruining the game for everyone.

Then again, I don't really game anymore, but I still hate 12 year olds.
  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 02:58 PM     
  I'm blocked  
from a day of defeat server.

someone shot me in the leg at the spawn point, so I turned round, drew my pistol, and shot him in the head.
Unfortunatly I shot the admin, not the guy who shot me.
I explained, he wasnt happy and blocked me.
  by: Gogevandire   06/01/2007 03:19 PM     
Somehow I have the feeling that you're talking about CS? Obviously, I could be wrong, but you pretty much nailed the same reason why I quit playing long before HL2 & CS:S came out. I'll stick with Operation Flashpoint & Armed Assault; no kiddies there, thank you very much!
  by: otaku77302000   06/01/2007 03:22 PM     
Yeah, I was a CS player since Beta 5...
I used to love it, but the more and more popular it got, the more and more horrible the game experience became. I never touched CS:S, I heard good things about it though.

Yeah, if you're going to murder teammates, try not to murder the admin. You weren't one of those people that'd launch a random grenade right at start were you?
  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 03:41 PM     
No, I even hated the newbs who randomly shot the air at the spawn point.
I only shot this guy because he shot me first.
  by: Gogevandire   06/01/2007 03:56 PM     
  @ Valkyrie123  
What kind of retarded idea is that? Ban all children from the internet?
It's not even worth making my case here to be honest, as thankfully, people like yourself could never enforce a ban.
  by: bugmenot   06/01/2007 04:27 PM     
I'd venture to say she was kidding... but then again... at least partially?

Yeah, there used to be a constant stream of people that'd shoot their own teammates (but not kill them) so they wouldn't suffer a teamkill penalty, yet they'd pretty much ruin everything.

All in all, let's start up the legislation to ban 12 year olds!
  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 04:34 PM     
Theres lots of things children arent allowed to do.
See certain films
certain pictures
have sex
drive a car.
enter certain places, at all, or unaccompanied, or at certain times ect.

Why should they be able to use the internet?
  by: Gogevandire   06/01/2007 05:05 PM     
I take it you let your 7 year old frequent bars and drive your car too. No I’m not kidding. If the internet is so dangerous that we have entire departments of the police force searching day and night for predators, wasting my tax dollars, just ban the kids from the internet. Tell them to go outside and get some fresh air and some exercise, get a job delivering newspapers and learn some work ethics. Hold them responsible if they go where they don’t belong just like if they get caught in a bar. There is no other way to make the internet safe. If you think there is, I and a whole lot of Attorney Generals would like to hear about it. Kids sitting on their asses all day playing video games and surfing porn is not a good thing. That should be left to the adults.
  by: Valkyrie123     06/01/2007 05:11 PM     
So, who has the money to buy us some congressman now?
  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 05:25 PM     
  @ Gogevandire  
To explain: I take this stance, on the basis that the risk of children becoming targets for abductions/abuse, through the internet, is very low.
To outright ban children from the internet is therefore akin to banning them from reading; the cons massively outweigh the pros.

Filtering the internet is basically impossible; there is always going to be a work around whatever surf-monitoring software being used. (Take that with a pinch of salt please... Although, I've never struggled to go places I wasn't supposed to.)

Having said that, I feel that there aren't many negative educational experiences on the internet, and that it's an invaluable medium for them to 'grow' with regardless.

Back to what I said earlier, about enforcement; Books have long since contained risque political messages and pornographic scenes. The problem with censoring them has been that no centralised index of the content, or standardised measure of its 'offensiveness' has ever been established. Because of this, they have never been consistently censored, and have consequently become accepted. Why not treat the internet in the same way?
  by: bugmenot   06/01/2007 05:26 PM     
not all kids use internet for porn. A lot of them use it for school. so taking that away is not fair to them. ive been readin lots of your post and you are one crazy person.
  by: talk2me   06/01/2007 05:30 PM     
That's why we love her

Yeah, it isn't really feasible to block kids from the internet. It could only be enforced by the parents, and if they would enforce that, they might as well spend time teaching their kid responsibility as opposed to prohibiting them from the internet.

As a side note, (no real facts to back this up) I would say the average kid doesn't use the internet for any real educational benefit. In fact, the common adult doesn't really seem to use it for any educational benefit.

  by: Svengali   06/01/2007 05:50 PM     
  I kind of agree with Valk on this one.  
"If the internet is so dangerous that we have entire departments of the police force searching day and night for predators, wasting my tax dollars, just ban the kids from the internet".


The reality is that in situations like these, the "children" are never held accountable for what they do. It's always the evil porn website (with it's 20 "over 18 only" disclaimers) that damage their fragile little minds. Beh. I know that when I was 12 with my brand new 28.8k modem; the first thing I did as soon as my parents were gone was hit the porn sites (hey, at least I'm honest). I knew *exactly* what I was doing. It's not like I stumbled across it by accident. I did at least know enough not to give out my personal info to anyone, and would never have dreamed of meeting in-person with anyone I met on the web. If a kid can't be responsible enough to look out for his/her own safety, than they shouldn't be on the 'net. Period.
While I recognize that the internet has obvious value for school work; the filters that are used in school internet systems seem sufficient; quite frankly, if the kid is dumb enough to want to meet a stranger from the internet, then they shouldn't be intelligent enough to get around the filter. Parent's (who are often far behind the curve, as far as computer literacy goes) can't be expected to keep full track of what their far more computer-savvy children are doing online. As I said, the bottom line is that if their child is too stupid and/or irresponsible to stay away from strangers, then they shouldn't be allowed online. Passwords work wonders.
  by: otaku77302000   06/01/2007 05:53 PM     
  Well Bug,  
I guess most people that think outside the box are considered crazy. I usually think outside a completely different box than the one you are used to. Keep your mind closed, it’s safer for all of us that way. If you have a better solution, and it won’t cost me more tax dollars I’d like to hear it…..I’m still waiting…..

There would be no need to enforce the law unless some parent complained about their kid accessing a porn site, in which case the parent and the kid would be brought up on charges of illegal access. Or some kid ran off with some 40 year old pedo she met on the internet in which case the kid would be charged with invading an adult safe zone.

I for one am tired of living in preschool Amerika. F the children, if you can’t keep control of your kids you shouldn’t be having any. If you are a parent you should accept the responsibility and act like a parent, not a child.

A little madness now and then is relished by the wisest men….and women.
  by: Valkyrie123     06/01/2007 06:41 PM     
  Sorry Bug,  
my last comment was suppose to be for Talk2Me. Have to slow down. Installing IPSec VPN P2P tunnel at the moment and it is distracting.
  by: Valkyrie123     06/01/2007 07:42 PM     
  You have to be  
13 to sign up on web sites in the states, that's the law, baby.

And on site hosted on US servers.
  by: NuttyPrat     06/01/2007 08:30 PM     
  Ban Kids?  
And, um, just how would this be enforced?

Someone was bitching about wasting tax dollars on cops to find predators, what do you think the cost involved are to effectively make sure 'how many million computers' don't have kids on them?

Not to mention, just who is it you are implying do the banning? Just the US? Every country?

There's a hell of a lot more to it than just saying "ban all the kids".
  by: Discarded Vet   06/01/2007 10:52 PM     
  @ Valkyrie123  
".....Ban on children on the internet. Make it a crime for anyone under the age of 16 to use the internet....."

".....I for one am tired of living in preschool Amerika. F the children, if you can’t keep control of your kids you shouldn’t be having any....."

You have completely contradicted yourself with these two statements.

Which is it, ban the kids which is the concept of Preschool America, or parents control your own kids?
  by: Discarded Vet   06/01/2007 10:59 PM     
What if you as a parent have installed every filter ont he market, have complex passwords on everything and sit with your kid everytime they want to use the computer. They want to go to a friends house and you tell the friends parents that they are not allowed on the net at friends houses. Friends parents say ok I won't let him on the net, hang up and allow them to surf the day away to be "cool". Any ban that is on children on the net, there will always be parents trying to be "cool" instead of parents who allow their kids, and their kids friends to use it. How can we control that? Babysit our kids while they are at another kids house? Follow them everywhere they go every minute of every day? Track every movement they do and every activity they do?
  by: notalentassclown     06/01/2007 11:25 PM     
  @Discarded @Notalent  
How are those two statements contradictory? “Don’t let your children drink and smoke and keep control of your children so they don’t.” Is that contradictory? Put down the bottle.

And some parents think it’s kewl to let their children drink and smoke. If your kid comes home and tells you so and so’s parents let him surf the web, call the cops and have them arrested just like you would do if the kid came home drunk. We don’t have to enforce this law, it is self enforcing in that it removes the capacity to bitch about your kid accessing porn sites. Why was your kid surfing the web, just like, why was your kid in the XXX book store? If your kid went into the XXX book store or the titty bar why are you allowing your kid to do illegal things. Put the enforcement task back on the parents, not on society. Your kids are not our problem or responsibility, they are your problem and your responsibility, so take care of them, act like a parent not an over grown child.
  by: valkyrie123     06/02/2007 04:53 PM     
Valkyrie you just have taken a view and opinion that made me lose all respect for you. If we were to follow your reasoning we might as well ban all children under 16 from being allowed out to play after school.(you never know when a person is going to drive by and steal your child.) Hell lets go a step further we can home school all children from's the only way to keep them safe. God the internet is just as dangerous as allowing your child to play in the yard while you do your dishes or watch tv. It is impossible to keep a eye on your child 24/7, this is why parents set rules/teach there children the proper way to deal with strangers. I would love to see any one explain to me how this is any different then useing the internet.(I am rambling now, I will shut up.)
  by: Vtigo   06/02/2007 05:28 PM     
  @ valkyrie123  
Judging by the very un-warranted insinuation that I am a drunkard, and your apparant disposition of 'defense' - you are quite aware of the contradiction.
  by: Discarded Vet   06/02/2007 06:54 PM     
  This thead  
has the Pedobear seal of approval.
  by: datsuncaptain1     06/02/2007 11:28 PM     
I don't think the solution is to ban kids from the internet. I think the solution is that parents need to take responsibility for what their kids do on the internet.

Parents need to sit next to their kids while they are on the internet. Put the computer in an easily visible place, so you can watch them while doing other things, like put it near the TV. When you aren't home with your kids, take the power cord to the router with you. Install keylogger programs on the machine your kids use, so you can see exactly what they do. There are a number of solutions parents could do, but don't. If you are a parent, and can't be bothered to do really do anything about it, you get what you get, but don't come bitching to ban this or ban that from the internet.

To quote Bender "Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV(in this case Internet), sitting down with your children, and hitting them??"
  by: tellgar     06/02/2007 11:49 PM     
  Not govts business  
parents are to blame. won't someone think about the children?
  by: RyanB     06/03/2007 12:38 AM     
Come on you know as well as I do that a good portion of children will not tell you that they surfed the net at billy's house if they know they aren't supposed to. They will drink and not tell you, they will smoke and not tell you. Obviously the latter two have things that can let you know what they are up to (drunkness, hangover, smell, etc). You don't think that it scares the crap out of me what my kids will be up to, pressured to do, and other things when I am not around them? YOu think that they will come home and say "hey ma I had sex tonight!" or "hey ma I snorted some cocaine". Somehow I have to allow them out of my sight and know that I raised them well enough to think for themselves and not follow the crowd. I have to hope that they will make the right choices for their lives when they are older. But so much depends on the kids personality too. Are they softspoken? shy? outgoing? opinionated? etc. That also plays a great deal into how they will conduct themselves among peer pressures. My friend is a great mom, strict and has honest kids. She worries about her oldest because his personality is that of a follower, her younger one is that of a leader. Do you think that every kid who has gotten drunk, high, laid, etc has lazy irresponsible parents who neglected their duties?
  by: notalentassclown     06/03/2007 03:21 AM     
  a question  
Now no 8 year old should be meeting someone they don't know, etc. We all know that. But does it at any point go from blaming the parents to the kids? Kids are VERY manipulative. I know, I was a master of it. I still am in a different way lol. I drank, smoked, did drugs, had sex all without my parents knowledge. I lied, I snuck, I weasled. And you know what if something happened those instances. Who do you blame? My parents? Me? We know the gov't isn't to blame, we can't have them raise our kids, etc. At what point does the child take responsiblity for their actions? Age 8, yeah it's the parents I know that. What about 13? 15? 17? Who's fault of it that my friend pulled the nails out of her bedroom window and used a rope ladder to sneak out and got raped at age 15?
  by: notalentassclown     06/03/2007 03:34 AM     
  If kids were banned from the internet  
The population of SN posters would drop in half.
  by: John E Angel     06/03/2007 04:34 AM     
  I Always  
Look up the history every now and then, not to be intrusive but for safety.
  by: captainJane     06/03/2007 04:39 AM     
  @ John E Angel  
".....The population of SN posters would drop in half....."

LMDAO !!!!
  by: Discarded Vet   06/03/2007 05:17 AM     
  @Vtigo @Discarded @telgar @notalent  
I had no idea that it was my job to earn your respect. Get a life. It appears that you choose to be an irresponsible parent and let society raise your child. Not my job. I didn’t have any of the fun creating your child. I guess you let your child frequent strip joints too. Please explain to me how the internet is safer than a strip joint? Quite obviously it is not. I have yet to read a story here about a child being raped by someone they met in a strip joint. I have lost all respect for you for letting children frequent a place that holds such great danger. Are you out of your mind? You are or well be a lousy parent. Next you will be demanding that bars and strip joints be tamed down so your child can go there too.

Please explain it to me, I’m a bit dense sometimes.

If parents actually did that we wouldn’t have this problem. Nice to see someone with their head pulled out of their pooter. Congratulations.

If you raise your child right and actually talk WITH your child you won’t have as many of these problems. Unfortunately most parents are too busy with their lives, too lazy or just plain irresponsible to raise their children and they want to let society shoulder their burden. Not our problem. Keep your pants on, don’t create any more little problems, we have enough. Are all parents irresponsible? Of course not. Kids will be kids but society should not be responsible for your child and what your child does. Society should not have to cater to you and protecting your child, that is the parent’s job. This is not a commune. Whose fault is it that this girl got raped because she pulled the nails out of the window? It sure isn’t societies. If you want us to lock her up till she is 18 so she can’t get away we could probably arrange that if you are willing to pay for her upkeep. If not, she is not society’s responsibility.

Seems a lot of people want society to raise their children. That sounds so communist. Think about it. Do you want society to invade your home and raise your child? Would you like us to monitor your child’s every move and spy on them just to make sure they are safe? I doubt it. Then I guess it’s your job. Talk WITH your children. Spend time WITH your children. They should be your best friends. Don’t let your 7 year old drive your car, don’t let them frequent bars and you sure as hell better be paying attention if you let them on the internet. By your choice YOU are the only one that can protect them. THE INTERNET IS DANGEROUS FOR CHILDREN.
  by: valkyrie123     06/03/2007 05:34 AM     
I'm totally in agreement that it's not society/governments job to monitor or take care of our children. Hell I wouldn't trust them to lol, they suck at everything else how could they do that right? I agree with everything you have said, that's not the problem really. I know exactly how I'm going to raise my kids and be open and hopefully have an honest relationship with them where they feel they can talk to me about things (that our parents would have never ever dreamed of talking to us about lol). I know what you mean too about society. How sad is it that in my sons class (pre-k special ed) letters home (they are written, copied and sent to everyone) that the teacher has to tell parents to give thier kids breakfast? to tell them to put hats and mittens on them in the winter? So I know exactly the kind of parent you are talking about. My long winded point was that sometimes you can do everything "right" and be the "perfect" parent - and kids will still get messed up, do stupid things, etc.

My question was, what is the line where the parents have obviously done everything but the child still finds ways around it? At what point is the child held responsible for their actions of sneaking, lying and manipulating to their parents? Everyone immediately says "oh it's the parents fault they were stupid and lazy and didn't care". Well yeah in most cases I'm sure that's true (an 8 year old meeting a 40 year old at McDonalds, etc). It just seems like sometimes it's forgotten that kids are giong to do what they are going to do no matter how we talk or try to stop them, or if we were the June Cleaver of parenting.

I suppose I am overly paranoid about what my kids might do, I probably am. I look at my family and my friends that I had and it's amazing the stuff we did just by lying and sneaking around behind thier backs (at 2am or 2pm). I totally think that we would have been responsible for our actions of sneaking out at age 15 or whatever age. I might question everything my kids do in their teens, I hope not, but I will be following their tracks to see that they are doing what they say they are doing. But even then other parents can't be trusted. I spent the night in downtown chicago at a guys house smoking weed and drinking at age 17 with some friends. Those friends (they were sisters) mom was willing to lie to my mom if she called there and say that yes I was there but was out at a movie or something with the girls. I feel like it's a double edge sword...I obviously can't blindly trust them that would be idiotic. But I can't be up their ass every second of every day or they will do everything that I accuse/am suspicious of them of doing simply because "if you think i'm doing it I might as well do it" type logic. My biggest damn fear is the teen years. It scares me to hell. I wish to god that a owners manual would pop out following the birth of each kid lol.
  by: notalentassclown     06/03/2007 06:05 AM     
I always enjoy your discussions.

Do you need to raise a perfect child? You ran amuck, I ran amuck and we both lived to tell the tale. You can’t protect them from everything. If they are that screwed up Darwin will let you know. All you can do is guide them the best you can and listen to them. No one said it would be easy. My point is, for millions of years children have been growing up without the internet. Depriving them of the internet now is not going to kill or injure them. Allowing them free reign of the internet very well could kill or inure them.

When will they be old enough to be responsible for their actions? A hell of a lot younger than 18 IMHO. I knew what I was doing and I knew the difference between right and wrong long before I was 18. Obviously you did too. Some personal responsibility should definitely be meted out at an earlier age then 18. This could lead to a whole new thread and another discussion.

A good analogy of the internet:
Your house has a direct door to the public library. There is a huge amount of books in the library. The library is also full of perverts and half the books are porn. Are you going to allow your child to go through that door unaccompanied or are you going to keep it locked or even board it up. It’s your choice.
  by: valkyrie123     06/03/2007 06:49 AM     
I agree comepletely the internet isn't necessary. I won't allow them to chat or use Im's or anything on there, not even with school friends. I am not into the whole school scene yet with them but I think that the internet is required for some school projects. But that's no biggie, I'd be right there for that one. IMO the internet has just opened a huge door for child predators - almost like a free pass. They can pose as a 11 or 12 year old girl and pretend to befriend a kid in a chat room and say lets meet at McD's, etc. You know how it goes. I really wish that I could trust other parents, but I feel the only way to do that is to befriend the parent myself, get to know them and their beliefs/parenting style. Do you believe that we have to be more "on the ball" than our parents did? I feel like we will have to be one step ahead of them without knowing where their next step will be.
  by: notalentassclown     06/03/2007 06:30 PM     
  Your right valk  
we do live in a god damn preschool country. Everyone has to be taken care of because if they are too stupid to feed theirself they might sue somebody. Being a parent and being responsible are also politically incorrect now. How dare you tell anyone to get a job or to not be lazy, or to take some responsibility for their actions. Society sucks and its cause we allow losers to run free who think its govt and societies job to take care of them.
  by: RyanB     06/04/2007 03:16 AM     
  Why limit this caution to children?  
Greetings and Salutations

Most people that access the internet do not grasp the concept of the internet. This is why spam and phishing are multi-billion dollar per year industries. These industries probably wouldn't be so prevalent if more people in the world sitting in front of computers actually had a clue. Unfortunately, it is clear to me most people have no clue. So why limit this caution to children? That's as bad as limiting cautions about smoking and drinking to only children, as they are bad things for everyone.

Most school's have internet filters either provided by their ISPs, their IT department, or both. Even if these firewalls, proxies, and any other measures taken can block most of the unintended adventures into cyberspace (some lists I've seen block over 600,000 sites,) there are always new sites not listed in the banned-sites lists.

I wish it were as simple as leaving it into the hands of the parents. Unfortunately, it seems too many parents are single parents or both parents work jobs outside of their homes these days and it is impossible to always be there. That seems a problem in itself with society. In comes schools, especially public schools, as a babysitter.

I purchased my first computer when I was 14. Within less than a year I was going to BBS meetings, with other real live friends I had known previously, at public places. Those were some good times, and I can't imagine them as having been withheld from me.

While some children, like I remember myself as being, deserve more credit, there will always be problems out there.

Education is better than censorship. Censoring the internet or even general computer use is like ignoring the problem or imagining it isn't there. It's better to say, "Here is an example, it is wrong because..."

Good times.
  by: ibcm   06/09/2007 11:49 AM     
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