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10/03/2007 03:25 PM ID: 65356 Permalink   

Finally Proof - Alcohol Makes You Clever


Researchers from the University of Auckland New Zealand, have discovered a link between Alcohol and Brain Function. It has been proven that a measured "dose" of alcohol a day can "heightened cognition" in lab rats.

The rats were split into 3 groups. The first was given the rat equivalent of 6 pints a day, the second, only a few drinks (the equivalent to keep someone just under the drink drive limit) and finally the third unlucky group was Tea Total (No Alcohol).

It turns out that through the use of several tests, but most notably a black electric pad in their cage, the rats that had consumed a few drinks a day learned very quickly not to walk on the pad, unlike the tea-totallers and booze-hounds.

    WebReporter: spacechimp Show Calling Card      
ASSESS this news: BLOCK this news. Reason:
  Genetically modified?  
"...cutting edge Kiwi genetically modified alco-rat research." Could this affect the outcome of the research?
  by: David M Barger     10/03/2007 03:33 PM     
The drunk rats probably found it funny to keep walking on the black pad and getting a shock!
  by: Anglo_Englishman   10/03/2007 03:45 PM     
Just what I needed to hear :-)
  by: Maxx20     10/03/2007 03:52 PM     
but not witty
  by: m.i.a.elite     10/03/2007 05:21 PM     
There is a huge difference between being clever and being a smartass.

Nothing is quite as boring as dealing with a drunk.

Mostly alcohol just makes people THINK they are clever.
  by: LeePIII   10/03/2007 06:17 PM     
I'm pretty sure that the summary states that the rats who partook of the alcohol 'did not' walk on the electric pad.
  by: John E Angel     10/03/2007 07:36 PM     
  Clever? Define clever.  
When they said clever, is that:
Left side: analytical
Right side: intuitive
I doubt it makes you clever; maybe it allows you to make connections between two disparate circumstances. 'Freeing your mind' or 'Thinking out of the box' as it were.

<flippant comment>Next time I want to avoid electrified pads, I'll remember</flippant comment>
  by: redstain   10/03/2007 07:42 PM     
  Clever? Define clever.  
I'm pretty sure that means 'smarter than the average bear'.
There was a Simpsons episode once where Homer was plastered at a party and he imagined himself being the bell of the ball, witty, highly entertaining and bringing on gales of laughter. Then it showed it from the perspective of the party-goers and they all saw a sorry, drunk, slobbering buffoon. I find that an occasional libation enables me to stiffen my resolve. Cold beer on football Sunday is a treat. But makes you clever? I wish.
  by: John E Angel     10/03/2007 08:10 PM     
  beer always makes me clever...  
it's about time it makes rats clever.
  by: mexicanrevolution   10/03/2007 09:24 PM     
  @John E Angel  
dude i though u were smarter than that...

"the rats that had consumed a few drinks a day learned very quickly not to walk on the pad, unlike the tea-totallers and booze-hounds."

im pretty sure Anglo_Englishman was talking about the "booze-hounds"

as the experiment ivolved 3 different subjects, the light drinker, heavy drinker, and the loser non-drinker.
  by: m.i.a.elite     10/04/2007 12:08 AM     
  I have always theorised this  
small amounts of alcohol causes a release of Dopamine(one of the 4 major neurotransmitters). As long as theres a middle ground between Dopamine release and the CNS depresent effects there's no reason to beilive that it doens't have mild nootropic effects. Alcohol also attaches it's self to the acetylcholine receptors. There is very little information on what exactly it does to these receptor sites, how ever considering how much Alcohol increases the effectiveness of nicotine I wouldn't be surprised if it did the same for acetylcholine. I'm interested in how much alcohol must be be consumed before the GABA receptors get clogged causing and over all 'dumbening'.
  by: shoezacks   10/04/2007 01:09 AM     
  Also keep in mind...  
these are the very same people that fondle sheep in their sleep.
  by: Zmethod     10/04/2007 04:45 AM     
what do you mean in their sleep?
  by: John E Angel     10/04/2007 03:49 PM     
Finally they came up with something useful, who's up for a round of tequila?
  by: iBye   10/04/2007 10:29 PM     
  @John E  
Use your imagination ; ]
  by: Zmethod     10/05/2007 08:08 AM     
  I dont need to sleep  
to fondle sheep.
  by: John E Angel     10/05/2007 04:20 PM     
oi, i take offense to that, plus you've got it all wrong, its the aussies not us innocent kiwis ;)

  by: rockaholic   10/06/2007 01:07 PM     
  I Thought it was a legal requirement  
Everyone must own their own set of Velcro Gloves in New Zealand. I might be wrong though :P
  by: spacechimp     10/11/2007 11:45 AM     
  @John E  
It's the poor sheep that are asleep...
  by: Zmethod     10/12/2007 05:11 AM     
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