Neorhino Party Promise Marijuana and Orgasms for Everyone

Repealing the law of gravity;
Paving Manitoba to create the world's largest parking lot;
Providing higher education by building taller schools;
Instituting English, French and illiteracy as Canada's three official languages;
Tearing down the Rocky Mountains so that Albertans could see the Pacific sunset;
Making Montreal the Venice of North America by damming the St. Lawrence River;
Abolishing the environment because it's too hard to keep clean and it takes up so much space;
Annexing the United States, which would take its place as the third territory, after the Yukon and the Northwest Territories (Nunavut did not yet exist) in Canada's backyard, in order to eliminate foreign control of Canada's natural resources;
Ending crime by abolishing all laws;
Paving the Bay of Fundy to create more parking in the Maritimes;
Turning Montreal's Saint Catherine Street into the world's longest bowling alley;
Adopting the British system of driving on the left; this was to be gradually phased in over five years with large trucks and tractors first, then buses, eventually including small cars and bicycles last;
Selling the Canadian Senate at an antique auction in California;
Putting the national debt on Visa;
Declaring war on Belgium because a Belgian cartoon character, Tintin, killed a rhinoceros in one of the cartoons;
Offering to call off the proposed Belgium-Canada war if Belgium delivered a case of mussels and a case of Belgian beer to Rhinoceros "Hindquarters" in Montréal (the Belgian Embassy in Ottawa did, in fact, do this);
Painting Canada's coastal sea limits in watercolour so that Canadian fish would know where they were at all times;
Banning guns and butter, since both kill;
Banning lousy Canadian winters;
Renaming the country Nantucket;
Donate a free rhinoceros to every aspiring artist in Canada

i dunno whether to treat this as a joke or take it seriously. lemme think aboot it.

thought about it and its awesomly ridanculous.

i wud vote for them (if i was canadian) if they could cancel law of gravity.
(/sarcasm)
Also donating a rhino to every aspiring artist wud be fun to watch. One thing for sure, there are gonna be a lot of video clips on youtube showing aspiring artists being gored by restless rhinos.

def vote for them. All sounds like good fun to me.

about abolishing the environment

Could we please import a few of these pro-active politicians into the USA? I don't like the Spanish thing but the rest sounds OK. We could promote them on the Daily Show and Colbert Report.

I'm leaning to the Regressive Party
(AGAINST abortion, FOR killing babies)
http://theworstpageintheuniverse.com/

At long last I have a political party that I can truly believe in, a party that understands me and caters to my fantasies and dysphoria’s. A party that really knows how to PARTY! Imagine! I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty. Remember, man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

If I were 80 years older, wait, not, I'll be dead before I'm 80 let alone alive in another 80 years

If you were 80 years younger...

"disenfranchised with politics."

Better to day "disenfranchised with reality" Sure they are not base in San Francisco?

and empty beercans in every driveway.


i do admit though, it might be swell to have yer own private rhino. maybe one could train it to be an attack rhino?

Could we write them in for president ot the USA in 2008? They get my vote!

Well they will get my vote can you please insist they run in UK?

Ace story I do not understand why no-one is taking this as serious? it is beyond me this party has all the answers we could ever need.

Gordon Brown wake up and smell the pot.

about higher education and belgians actually made me laugh out loud

I would only use my rhino when I need to park in a crowded lot and some jerk is taking up two spaces. Rhinos love shoving things around and putting huge horn-holes in them.

They have some brilliant ideas...they've got my vote! Particularly noteworthy is the idea of "selling the Canadian Senate at an antique auction in California". The senate would finally have some value in Canada!! :p

i dunno.... it would be awfully tempting to take your rhino to parties, .. get it to balance a hotdog on its horn. or make it beg for treats.. how about taking your rhino to the beach for a jog?


or you could always just use your rhino to move those knuckleheads who insist on parking their cars in their handicapped spots with no placard.

your own personal rhino is all of a sudden sounding more and more swell by the minute,