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05/01/2008 06:59 PM ID: 70402 Permalink   

Police Respond to Felony Wedgification

 

The North Platte police were dispatched to a William Ave. home on a complaint of a wedgie. One man's son gave a wedgie to their neighbor's child. The officer talked with all concerned and calmed the situation down, no one was cited or arrested.

"You might get away with that in Lincoln or Omaha, but we're not going to allow wedgies in North Platte", the spokesman said. The spokesman also said they planned to put a stop to wedgies before they escalate to full-blown melvins or atomic wedgies.

A wedgie is the condition of having one's underwear pulled up so that it goes between the buttocks. Thus the phrase "giving a wedgie."

 
  Source: northplattebulletin.com  
    WebReporter: Allanthar Show Calling Card      
  Recommendation:  
ASSESS this news: BLOCK this news. Reason:
   
  6 Comments
  
  I HAD TO!!  
 
I had to report on this, it was way too funny! "They planned to stop wedgies before the escalate to full-blown melvins or atomic wedgies."
Thats hilarious!
 
  by: Allanthar     05/01/2008 07:00 PM     
  Fail  
 
Not epic, but fail nonetheless.
 
  by: nofattieskthx   05/01/2008 08:15 PM     
  Obviously  
 
the police have WAY TOO MUCH time on their hands.
 
  by: sleeky     05/01/2008 11:02 PM     
  What?  
 
Did North Platte run out of donuts or something?
 
  by: grumpy ray     05/02/2008 04:28 AM     
  You guys realize...  
 
That's still assault & battery, right? Maybe even sexual assault.

Also, there's nothing in the source about "felony" except in the title.
 
  by: edya   05/02/2008 04:50 AM     
  .  
 
This is funny.
 
  by: vizhatlan     05/02/2008 12:13 PM     
 
 
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