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10/31/2008 01:35 PM ID: 74454 Permalink   

Vicar Undergoes Surgery to Extract Potato From Anus


A 50 year old clergyman was admitted to Sheffield's Northern General Hospital with a potato stuck in his backside after he allegedly fell onto the vegetable while hanging curtains in the nude.

The A&E nurse who dealt with the embarrassed vicar, Trudi Watson told reporters " it's not for me to question his story" and added that the man underwent surgery to extract the spud from his anus.

    WebReporter: Hugo Chavez Show Calling Card      
ASSESS this news: BLOCK this news. Reason:
so unrealistic excuse, but why a potato?
  by: securityunion     10/31/2008 01:55 PM     
Cucumbers are out of season.
  by: VermiciousG     10/31/2008 02:12 PM     
  I presume  
That sexual contact with vegetables is not a sin, yet?
And thankfully it wasn't a young boy or girl he was trying to extract himself from...
  by: Allanthar     10/31/2008 02:51 PM     
  Oh, oh!  
Maybe he thought his butt was made by Ronko and that he could make french fries by putting the potato in there! ROFL
Or he was testing out the South Park theory of shoving food up his butt as a way of eating...
Gotta love the clergy for being so brave to test out theories on human behavior so!
  by: Allanthar     10/31/2008 02:53 PM     
  Not all Excuses are Created Equal  
I could have thought of so many better excuses on my way to the operating room, the uncreative bastard.

Here I thought of few right now: "My granny always told us potatoes can take care of her hemorrhoids" or the classic "My teeth hurt so I have trouble chewing my food before I swallow it" or "an angel showed up and told me I will have a potato in my ass without any insertion." etc.. etc..

Fell on a potato while hanging curtains?
  by: kmazzawi     10/31/2008 03:22 PM     
  Yea but....  
how did it taste?
  by: valkyrie123     10/31/2008 03:50 PM     
like S#!t
  by: VermiciousG     10/31/2008 04:01 PM     
Great find Hugo.

A bizarre story, but what about the excuse.

First off, why would you be nude while hanging curtains. Surely the thing about hanging curtains is that you are going to be standing in front of a window that is currently not covered (usually), so why be naked doing that?

And secondly, landing anus first onto a potato has to be really unlikely.

All that said, if he wanted something up his bottom, there are several better shaped fruits and vegetables.
  by: ZCT     10/31/2008 04:45 PM     
I guess he was lucky that he didn't land on a watermelon.
What an excuse. ROFLMAO
  by: JonSmith     10/31/2008 05:13 PM     
  Should we hear about it though?  
I'm all for the news, and it's a great story, so don't get me wrong on that front...

....however I'm a bit concerned that such personal medical issues are made public so easily. Priest or no, everyone is entitled to their dignity and privacy in a medical facility.
  by: chiffington   10/31/2008 05:14 PM     
Yeah, I actually agree with that.

Although in all fairness, I don't think his name or address was released.

So all we know is that a vicar in his 50s somewhere in the north of England, has a sore anus at the moment.
  by: ZCT     10/31/2008 05:31 PM     
I know what you mean...however just imagine if the story had been about you and had mentioned your nearest hospital... I'm sure you'd be blushing and be slightly panicky in case someone figured out it was you (as well as wiping away tears - heheh).

Still - hanging curtains naked...I'd hate to see what he put the hooks on whilst doing it..
  by: chiffington   10/31/2008 05:51 PM     
  that remember me  
a Seinfield episode, "One in a million shot doctor, one in a million" XD
  by: demonh8   10/31/2008 06:03 PM     
  Vicar, Will You Have A Seat?  
Thank you no, I think I'll just stand here.

Vicar! Get out of my tater patch!!
  by: ichi     10/31/2008 06:46 PM     
  I believe him  
he was hanging curtains in the nude....and he fell. It's the truth. Not the whole truth- but the truth non the less.

The rest of the truth.
He was hanging curtains in the nude left foot on a chair and right foot on a couch while an altar boy was shoving a potato in his ass. The boy pushed too hard and his whole arm went in. When he pulled his arm out... the potato was not in hand. Then the vicar tried to push it out... and the alter boy tried to find it, but no luck. So he ended up in the emergency room.

The truth... alter boy's honor.
  by: mexicanrevolution   10/31/2008 10:09 PM     
I have no idea what to do with your post. "Cucumbers are out of season."

I think I will pass out laughing..
  by: isuzu     10/31/2008 10:56 PM     
  @Vicar's story  
Hey, this stuff happens. Once I was nude (as is often the case) and decided to dust the ceiling fan. Just as I finished and was descending the ladder, I mis-stepped and fell into a basket containing ears of corn. I picked myself up and brushed myself off not realizing there was one less ear of corn in the basket.

My next stint in the john proved more challenging then usual. After pushing with all my might, I finally got relief. At that point I glanced into the toilet and in shock I exclaimed "I donna remember eatin' corn!"

(Yeah, that was an extremely long way to go to quote an Austin Powers movie!)
  by: opinionated   10/31/2008 10:58 PM     
Yea I know what you mean. Last week I was out in the garden painting the ceiling and I kept falling off the ladder. Five potato(e)s, fourteen ears of corn, six cucumbers and three watermelons later, yep, twenty-seven trips to the hospital in a week before I realized the garden doesn’t have a ceiling. Tough week, gawd I love that corn. But verm’s right, they did taste like sh!t.
  by: valkyrie123     11/01/2008 12:33 AM     
  What I'd Like to know is,  
Was it Boiled , Roasted or Ready canned.
  by: steve2045     11/03/2008 08:25 PM     
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